I think I am going to enjoy this Live writer thing.

Well I just want to say that I have been going through quite a bit lately.  For one thing, I am really enjoying God's blessings on me.  He gave me Windows Vista for free, y'all, when I shouldn't have even qualified for it.  But I got it in the mail a little back.  I am enjoying it so.  I got Windows Vista Home Premium.  I am thinking about upgrading to Windows Vista Ultimate.  I will have to see.

Before I can upgrade to anything, I need to find me another job.  I am tired of my brother grogging down my throat about getting a license, so I can drive everything and everybody around.  I don't think so.  I am not in need of a car, or my license or anything like that right not.  No one is gonna teach me to drive so my 30 dollars are gonna go to waste time after time after time, because I don't have the money for driving school, and of course, no one is going to pay for that either.  So I am out on my own, hearing criticisms from everyone, not near one of them willing to contribute to the cause, forget them, then.

But one thing for sure, I am in need of a job, and God did wake me up to go searching for one... no really he did.  He woke me up way before I would have gotten up so I could go downtown and drop off this job application and pick up a few more.  I will collect more and more and apply everywhere until I get a place that wants to hire me.  i need another job, for real.  the one I'm at, I know they are gonna treat me backwards.  I told them i needed less hours during the school year and more hours during the summer.  they worked me to death during the school year, and my grades suffered big-time for it.  And now during the summer, i barely have any hours.  it's awful, and I know they are gonna send my hours skyrocketing through the roof once school starts up, and I'm gonna be so upset.  If i can get another job before July is out, i will probably leave in the middle of August.  i don't think there is a need for me to work two jobs right now, especially since one check is as puny as the crack-head that just walked by.  i am not excited about my life, but you know something, neither is anyone else.

god told me something interesting, yesterday.  i was telling him how i hated living this life.  I have NO desire to kill myself, but I just would have rather just not been born, especially if I'd known life would be this aggravating.  i started to blame Adam for sinning and causing the earth to be cursed, but he stopped me.  He told me that people's lives being hard was due to their own sin, and their own arrogance.  So I had nothing to say.  He told me nobody liked the material aspect of this life.  no one likes having to work for their food, and clothes, soap, and who wants to pay rent every month, to have 800-1600 dollars disappear from your hand instantly is a sorrowful thing!  The only thing that makes this life worth while is Jesus Christ.  No one, not even his children likes to pay, and work 9-5 jobs and everything else that comes with the sadly fleeting happy moments of this life, But only his children have a direct connection to Him.  It is a relationship with Him and ONLY my relationship with Him that makes this life worth living.  I guess it's just like that old song says; "Your not living without Jesus in your life.  You're not living at all, but you're dying every day." 

This is not a pleasant life right now.  I need to up my efforts in building a relationship with God so that it can be.  I am unsure about my school, struggling money-wise, and STILL struggling with all type of sin, and i have a wife to go get, before it's too late!  My life will get better, y'all.  i know if I seek God constantly, he'll meet my needs, and life will just naturally be better.