My father is a stubborn, agervating man.  The fact that my mother has been married to him for over 30 years is a miracle to me!  UGH!

My father comes to complaining about how I am scratching up the side of his van by carrying out the trash cans past his van on trash day, after I told him a LLLLOOOOONNNNGGG time ago to park to one side of the driveway so I could have room to get the cans by without scratching up the side of his van, but will he do it? NOOOOO!

And once again, he sits crooked in the middle of the drive with NO chance of getting the cans by without scratching his van.  What am i to do?  Wake up my parents at 1 O clock in the morning so he can move the van out the driveway long enough for me drag out the cans?  i would never hear the end of it!  I don't HARDLY think so!

So I'm gonna just leave him alone and let him sleep.  he will wake in the morning with a note on the mirror, telling him I couldn't get the cans by his van last night without scratching it and he's gonna have to take out the cans.  Point-blank.  I'm just so... UGH!  Goodnight!

THIS BOOK IS SOOOOOOO LOOOOOONNNNGGGGGG!!!!  AAAAAHHHH!!!  I am finally on my way to finishing Harry Potter and the order of the Phoenix after a week of trudging though this book of 870 pages!  There have been too many down moments, and I've been really busy, so I haven't had much time to read it.  But I'm sure The Half Blood Prince will be better.  I have not finished the book yet, so I am still wondering what will happen to serious while he is in Voldemort's Possession.  And I'm so mad at Snape for cutting off Harry's Occlumency lessons.  Dumbledore has not been right yet, but I am sure he will prove to be right before this night is out.  And I wonder what the centaurs are going to do to that God-awful woman, Umbridge.  Now that was funny!  Let me see, what else.  Um, nothing.  I just want to get back to reading.  I'll be back to share my thoughts after the books is finished... Yeeeeaaaaaahh.

Currently on page 771 of Order of the Phoenix
 

i am no longer aiming to get that box set.  it would be nice to have.  But I don't cherish the Harry Potter books THAT much to want to buy the box-set to keep.  I am getting the books from the library and happily taking them back.  i don't want to KEEP in Harry Potter stuff in my house.  I'm good.

The Next Day....

ok, I'm back, and i finished order of the phoenix, FINALLY!  Whoever wants to read that book, beware.  It's extremely long.  That is jacked up how serious dies, and I couldn't imagine the burden that is now on Harry's shoulders right now because of Trelawney's prophecy.  I can't start Half Blood Prince, yet.  God said wait.  So...  I'm going to wait... successfully, this time.  Order of the Phoenix was a good book, with a great ending, although, it was really hard to appreciate and savor the ending.  I just wanted to hurry up and finish the darn thing.  it was so long.  I felt I had been reading it long enough.  My goodness, I can't get over how long it was!  Anyway, i have to get up for work tomorrow morning, so i am off to bed, now.  Goodnight.

The Goblet of Fire is a HUGE book.  I cannot get over that.  Way past 700 pages!!!

Anyway, when i first started reading Harry Potter, I was told not to forget God. (God said this, y'all not no other person.), and so there is a youth revival at my church this week, and I am the lead musician.  What a scary thought.  I did fairly well last night ONLY by the spirit of God moving through my hands.  i can testify to that.  But towards the end of the service, I heard Him say to take a break from Harry Potter until the revival is over.  Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday.  Just three days.  It is not bad.  i can handle that.... even though I did slip a little last night and today, but i want to be obedient to the God I told I would not forget.

So far, Goblet of fire is really good.  i know Harry was not expecting Harmoine to look so beautiful at that ball, and Ron didn't even recognize her when he walked passed/past (not sure which one should go there.  Someone help me out) her!  That was funny.  Well I will keep posting my progress, and maybe even a testimony from this weeks revival.

Which reminds me.... no... I'll save that for later if I remember.

BYE!

I am experiencing a GREAT moment of joy.  For about a month and a half, I have been asking my father to fix my window-screen, because bugs, moths, and potato bugs were coming in through the window.  And he also had to actually put a screen in the other window in my room.  Well, I'm glad to say that he put a screen in the screenless window, and told me how to patch up the holes in the one that needed fixing, YAY!!!  I"M SOOOOO HAPPY!!!!!!!!  My heart filled with such joy as I went to drop off my stuff in my room after work.  it was like instant rest.  My father was like, "Everything has a time.  Nothing happens before the time."  I thought to myself, "yeah, but things can happen after the time, as well," because this was LOOOOONG overdo.  but he finally did it.

A note on Harry potter.  i finished the chamber of secrets in less than twenty four hours, WITH the break of a good night's rest, meals, showers, and time to cook dinner.  I AM THE BOMB!!! lol!  Chamber of Secrets was Hilarious.  i would have started yesterday after I finished Chamber of Secrets, but my head was hurting.  I had been reading ALLLLLLLLL day long.  But I'm about to start it now.  Wish me luck.  I hope to be done by Monday afternoon (Busy weekend).  Have good sleeps everybody!

i was gonna start the book outside on the deck, but I waited too late, and the Mosquitos are starting to come out.  I'm going in the house to read.  goodnight everybody.

I finished the first Harry Potter book today at around 2, and went to the library to pick up the other three Harry Potter Books I didn't yet have which were

1. The Goblet of Fire
2. The Order of The Phoenix
3. The Half-Blood Prince

THESE BOOKS ARE HUGE!!!  Three single books, and my books bag was looking like I had bought all my books for school, LORD HAVE MERCY!!  My back was killing me by the time I got home.  i expressed my concerns before i even left the library.  The librarian said i would knock those books out in no-time.  She was shocked when i told her I had taken out the sorcerer's stone on Tuesday.

The Sorcerer's Stone was good.  It was fun to read, but because the books was so identical to the movie, I was kind of expecting everything so it wasn't as fun to read.  It was cool.  i started Chamber of Secrets, and this one you could tell there was some stuff cut out from the movie, so it is a good read.  I enjoyed reading about the Whomping Willow.  It's funny every time. And what's-his-name (something Lockhart) is even more agervating in the books than he is in the movie!  He does so much more stuff.  And Colin (the little boy you see flashing the camera that the Bludger chasing Harry almost hit in the movie) is a much more developed character in the book, and it's so funny to see him follow Harry EVERYWHERE.  Harry has a fan. lol. Well I'm going back to my reading. Good bye.

Currently on page 125 of The Chamber of Secrets

And yes, I still might be working towards this Harry Potter Chest

Well I posted a blog entry saying that i was starting the Harry Potter series.  Well surprise surprise.  i realized at around 5 o' clock today that i was half way done with The Sorcerer's Stone.  It's an amazingly quick read.  if this is the case, then I probably shouldn't be to worried when i get to extremely thick books like The Order of the Phoenix.  I will give a review when I am done with the book, probably by tomorrow evening or something. lol.  Well back to reading.  the book ain't half bad.  it doesn't seem like they cut out much of the book from the movie the way they did with Memoirs of a Geisha (GREAT book AND movie by the way).  But I will see you all later.  Love you much.  I have some question concerning the series at this point in time.  Maybe they will be answered later on in the series.  i will deal with all that later.  Bye all!

Currently on page 173 of The Sorcerer's Stone

Possibly working towards this chest with all the books in hardcover

Wish me luck everyone! lol.

Yea, this live Write program is cool, and I am blogging a lot more.  Microsoft has made something pretty useful here.

I have gained a new interest for the Harry Potter series.  I have been saying since high school that I was going to read the Harry Potter books.  Well I have decided to do it.  I went to the library, paid off old late fees and took out the first three books:

1. The Sorcerer's Stone
2. The Chamber of Secrets
3. The Prisoner of Azkaban

I now realize that I have my work cut out for me.  Because the story length grows exponentially with each succeeding story! I could have taken out the Order of the phoenix while I was at the library, but I only had so much time before I had to return my books, and I have to save some for later.  THAT BOOK IS HUGE!  I wonder how thick Sleepy Hallows will be when it comes out in a week and a half.  If I like this series enough, I might buy this box set of all 7 books that I saw on Amazon.com.  they come neatly packed in order (by book number and size coincidently, lol) in this neat little chest that has a silhouette of Harry Potter on the front.  it's neat looking.

The only thing is, I do have to watch what I do, because if I make this a mini-idol in my life, God will not be happy, and I will be opening doors to all types of extra crap in my life that I don't need, and it may make what is currently going on even worse, seeming as this book is about witchcraft and whatnot.  I know many people believe that this stuff isn't real, and the book is harmless, but since I know the truth, I'm not just gonna be dumb and haphazard with it.  I'm going to read the books, say "oh that was much better than the movie," and take the books back to the library.  and it will be done.  I am counting on God to remind me that he is still around.  I do tend to get caught up in these little phases in my life, and I don't want to forget about Him.

Yes I do care about my God.  That's why it's a concern to me.  He's been good to me, and I don't want to just ignore Him.  Since it's summer time, I do have plenty of time on my hands, so I can do some personal reading.  I have a feeling that these text size books are going to take up quite a bit of my time.  Joanne Katherine Rowling what on Earth was you thinking?!?!

Though I am grateful for this God-given opportunity to rest my brain, and get some much needed sleep, I do miss Tiffany, Connie, and Let-It-I-A (lol) and the rest of the gang from Jordan.  of all days for God to pick to tell me to stay home, but hey.  I am grateful.  I am going to rest my brain, and when this movie is done, I'm going to go to sleep.  goodnight everybody!!!!

I think I am going to enjoy this Live writer thing.

Well I just want to say that I have been going through quite a bit lately.  For one thing, I am really enjoying God's blessings on me.  He gave me Windows Vista for free, y'all, when I shouldn't have even qualified for it.  But I got it in the mail a little back.  I am enjoying it so.  I got Windows Vista Home Premium.  I am thinking about upgrading to Windows Vista Ultimate.  I will have to see.

Before I can upgrade to anything, I need to find me another job.  I am tired of my brother grogging down my throat about getting a license, so I can drive everything and everybody around.  I don't think so.  I am not in need of a car, or my license or anything like that right not.  No one is gonna teach me to drive so my 30 dollars are gonna go to waste time after time after time, because I don't have the money for driving school, and of course, no one is going to pay for that either.  So I am out on my own, hearing criticisms from everyone, not near one of them willing to contribute to the cause, forget them, then.

But one thing for sure, I am in need of a job, and God did wake me up to go searching for one... no really he did.  He woke me up way before I would have gotten up so I could go downtown and drop off this job application and pick up a few more.  I will collect more and more and apply everywhere until I get a place that wants to hire me.  i need another job, for real.  the one I'm at, I know they are gonna treat me backwards.  I told them i needed less hours during the school year and more hours during the summer.  they worked me to death during the school year, and my grades suffered big-time for it.  And now during the summer, i barely have any hours.  it's awful, and I know they are gonna send my hours skyrocketing through the roof once school starts up, and I'm gonna be so upset.  If i can get another job before July is out, i will probably leave in the middle of August.  i don't think there is a need for me to work two jobs right now, especially since one check is as puny as the crack-head that just walked by.  i am not excited about my life, but you know something, neither is anyone else.

god told me something interesting, yesterday.  i was telling him how i hated living this life.  I have NO desire to kill myself, but I just would have rather just not been born, especially if I'd known life would be this aggravating.  i started to blame Adam for sinning and causing the earth to be cursed, but he stopped me.  He told me that people's lives being hard was due to their own sin, and their own arrogance.  So I had nothing to say.  He told me nobody liked the material aspect of this life.  no one likes having to work for their food, and clothes, soap, and who wants to pay rent every month, to have 800-1600 dollars disappear from your hand instantly is a sorrowful thing!  The only thing that makes this life worth while is Jesus Christ.  No one, not even his children likes to pay, and work 9-5 jobs and everything else that comes with the sadly fleeting happy moments of this life, But only his children have a direct connection to Him.  It is a relationship with Him and ONLY my relationship with Him that makes this life worth living.  I guess it's just like that old song says; "Your not living without Jesus in your life.  You're not living at all, but you're dying every day." 

This is not a pleasant life right now.  I need to up my efforts in building a relationship with God so that it can be.  I am unsure about my school, struggling money-wise, and STILL struggling with all type of sin, and i have a wife to go get, before it's too late!  My life will get better, y'all.  i know if I seek God constantly, he'll meet my needs, and life will just naturally be better.

No... not me blogging, but what I'm using to blog.  it's this Windows Live Writer program that uploads my blogs to my blog. lol.  Neat.  This might get me back into bloggin because I haven't blogged in a while. lol. HEY!

God gives us so many blessings all the time…. Seriously, even if we don’t always recognize the blessings and see them.  Pride can surely get in the way of those blessings. 

My church has been blessed blessed blessed blessed blessed musically.  We have more than enough singers, musicians, songwriters, everything that has to do with music.  Which means, naturally, there are too many applicants, and not enough roles to fill, so some of the musicians have been pushed to the back-burner for some time.  And we have been overlooked.  Well one of the backburners had a chance, playing for one of the groups.  Because one of the main musicians weren’t available.  But When that main musician was available again, he was gone for a bit.  And when he was invited back as backup (which is what he had been doing in the first place), he declined, taking the opportunity as an insult and left the church, out of his own hurt, and to prevent pain in his family by the members of the church.

My story in this church as a musician is pretty much the same.  In my mind, I was rejected.  But a lot of stuff has been going on and things have been changing, and I have been “drafted” into the music team of my church by my grandfather, thank God.  But it wasn’t because I was good, it was because I was available when someone else wasn’t there.  Instead of seeing insult, I saw the blessing God was providing for me, and I accepted it.

And because I did not let my pride get in the way, people know that when this person isn’t available, and that person isn’t available, I am waiting on the backburner, and now, more and more, because of my lack of pride in this area, I have been pushed into the forefront because “once again, Nathan comes through, because he’s dependable; he’s just that kind of guy.”  This is what an uncle said to me, because I was there to play when I was needed.  I thank God for it.

Because now, people see me, they congratulate me, and they support me, because not only was I willing to wait in the background for GOD to provide opportunity, instead of me pushing myself into the spotlight, but I was able to see and accept the blessing, even when it didn’t come the way I initially had hoped.  The pride… it’s not a good thing.  And I thank God for giving me the eyes to see a blessing for a blessing, and not an insult for a blessing.

I wrote a poem for the first time in ages.  I think i will work with my cousin and make it into a song.  but yeah, here's the poem. It's called "Go See About Them."

Dear God,

I have a friend who needs you

The whole that is in her heart only sees you

But she tries to replace you

In a strong attempt to disgrace you

Saying she doesn't need you

God go see about her

There is this little boy down the street

He lives in the little green house that looks off beat

He is in a struggle for peace

But knows only trouble indeed

He doesn't know where to turn

God go see about Him

My family is falling apart

Each feels nothing but their own stalling heart

I look in their eyes and see hate

Everything in life now is a debate

For one after the other, there is a grudge

God go see about them

My friend has an imperfect past

But before you will no secret last

She knows of you

But hypocrisy clones you

She can't seem to grasp your true name

God, go see about her

God please let my prayers be heard

The lives of these lost are not insured

I know your hands will touch

Let my prayers availeth much

In Jesus' name I pray

Amen

The EX Daily Word for September 27, 2006

"Forgetting The Past"

Phil. 3:13 'No, dear brothers and sisters, I am still not all I should be,
but I am focusing all my energies on this one thing: Forgetting the past and
looking forward to what lies ahead,' NLT

You may be stronger because of your past. You may be wiser because of your
past.  But you are not who you were in your past!  Listen, we have a problem
sometimes forgetting.  It's not really people doing it to us as much as it
is us beating ourselves up because of stupid mistakes.  We think of the past
mistakes, sins, and just plain foolish decisions we made and we cringe
sometimes.  But we cannot focus on that.  God took it away when we asked him
to and he is concerned about where you are going and not where you have been
or what you have done. Out of all the people he used, he
never really talked about what they did in their past until they were dead and
gone.  He spoke about their future and their call.  He spoke about their
purpose and their faith.  Only these new Wolves in Sheep Clothing bring up
your hurts and pains of your past to manipulate your future and cause you
to be focused on who you are and not who God is!  Woman thou are loosed,
Man thou are loosed, and all the loosed messages are in your way because
when you accepted Christ, who you are stopped mattering, and who HE is
became priority!  Denying yourself is the total opposite of finding yourself
and being set free is the total opposite of being bound by your past!

Let it go my sister and brother. No matter how bad it is or was, God gave you
Jesus so you would be able to let it go.  We minimize the cross by carrying
past issues and sins around.  We take away from the power of Jesus' blood
when we harbor unforgiveness towards ourselves.  Look, after you are
forgiven, it's then time to move on. Don't hold on to your past any longer.
Allow God to be God and let him give you a fresh start.  I know it's hard
sometimes to forget things because people will try to remind you of it.  But
the bible says that we all have sins and come short.  What you did has been
done before.  But if sin could stop the plan of God, then the death of Jesus
was a farce!  The bible said that Jesus took the power of death, hell, and
the grave when he rose.  Hell?  That means, that hell has no power over you.
That means that your past sins no longer have the power to take you there!
So, if you have power over sin, then sin has no power.  Your past can't stop
you.  Forget about it!  Let it go and move forward in Christ.  Your sins are
not hidden, but they are buried!  Cast into the sea of forgetfulness, never
to be remembered by God again.  He has wiped them away and will continue to
if you continue to move forward.  But if you talk about it and worry about
it, you give it back it's power and you will begin to suffer for it.  Don't
give your past energy and power.  Don't awaken your past by worries and
woes.  Let it go and move on.  God has forgiven you, now it's time that YOU
let it go.
Suggested Reading:  Psa. 103:12, Heb. 8:12, Heb. 10:17, Rev. 1:18

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